When Words Fail
by robyshel
Summary: Beverly never realized that she actually loved Ben. And when Bill hurts her, his the first one she seeks for comfort. (Rated M for smut, They're supposed to be 18, Sweet)


**AN: They're supposed to be 18. I inspired myself in the cast of 2017. Don't like, don't read!**

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Ben was nostalgic as he looked around his room where all the Derry searching papers were hanging. Sure, he had been living there for four years now, but since they defeated Pennywise five years before, he grew accustomed to those posters and often forgot they were there. Sometimes he would realize their presence and would remember of the Loser's Club.

They were still friends and saw each other almost every day, but they weren't the same. After they all had almost died because of Pennywise, they started to rethink what they were doing with their lives and simply got too busy.

Eddie decided to become a rebel and would often smoke pot with Richie, who was still the 'trash mouth' and the only one who hadn't changed a single thing in his life. Oh, and Richie and Eddie were dating, and they were the cutest.

Mike started to study hard wanting to get rid of that life of killing animals. He really liked books and stayed the whole day at the library, where Ben used to be. It was almost like they switched parts. He even wanted to become a librarian himself. Being surrounded by books the whole day

was exciting for him.

Bill gathered the courage to ask Beverly out and she said yes, so they were dating and very happy.

Stanley saw things in a different way. Instead of doing what he wanted, he decided to devote himself to religion and was busy all the time with his dad.

Ben really was doing pretty much anything. In fact, he wasn't busy at all, but being around Bill and Bev while they were dating was too hard. It was obvious they had had sex and most importantly, that they were in love, so it hurt a lot. At least, that's what he thought.

It was his fault to not be close to the group anymore, but if only he had had the courage and asked Beverly out first... He was so stupid! What the hell was he doing to his life?

Those were the thoughts Ben often had when he remembered to look around his room thoroughly.

Ben was once again having one of his suicidal thoughts when he heard steps and then Beverly was standing in his door. He was alone in the house and of course when they were close she would go in without permission, because she always had it, but what the hell?

"Beverly?"

Beverly was panting, I mean she had run up the stairs, but it seemed a little bit more. Her eyes were wide open like she was scared, however glad to see him. Then, they were tearing up and she was crying.

"Oh my God, Bev, no!" Ben ran and hugged her wanting to show that she was safe with him, whatever had caused that. He wouldn't let anyone hurt her anymore. He held Beverly as she sobbed and whined. It was heartbreaking. He would kill whoever had done that. "Shhh, you're okay. I'm here with you."

"B-Ben..." She wanted to tell him why she was there, what was in her mind and heart, because she knew they weren't speaking that much, but she was crying too hard for that. And Ben held her tighter, not wanting to rush her. He would always be there, even if she didn't want that. If she didn't want to tell him, he'd be okay with it. Though he really wanted to kill that motherfucker, not mattering what he had done to her.

As she calmed down a bit - not that much - Ben decided he should make her comfortable in his house.

"Why don't you lay down? I'll grab a cup of water." He walked to the door and then turned, remembering something. "Unless you want something else. We have juices, sodas, even alcohol..."

"Water is fine, Ben."

He nodded and disappeared not wanting to annoy her anymore.

Well, Beverly wasn't feeling annoyed at all. She thought he was really cute and didn't want him to bother getting anything for her. She just wanted an assurance everything would be okay.

Ben came back and made her lay in his bed, after she drank her water, and lay with her. He also brought tissues.

They were laying on their sides looking at each other and he took the opportunity to study the lines of her face. She was so beautiful. Just everything about her was amazing. Her green eyes, her freckles, her red hair... not to mention how kind and determined she was.

He sighed knowing that Beverly would never belong to him, but he was happy just to be her friend in times like this. Ben just couldn't see them together.

"Is everything okay?" She asked realizing Ben was suddenly sad.

"I don't like seeing you like this." That wasn't a lie, but it wasn't the reason sorrow suddenly filled his face.

She looked down thinking what she should tell him. She didn't really think through. When she realized, she was already there crying in his arms, but she didn't want him to resent Bill.

"You don't have to tell me." He read her like always. "I just wish I knew so I could help you." He confessed but didn't want to pressure her. If she needed revenge, she'd tell him.

"You already are." Beverly whispered rubbing Ben's chest and he looked down where her hand lay. Right above his heart.

Ben relaxed to that. She had never touched him like that. Sometimes they would hug before he got distant, but that was different. He didn't realize his heart was beating so fast.

It was Beverly's time to sigh. It was so obvious he liked her, and she had chosen Bill. At the time, she felt for attracted to him and he asked her out, but they didn't get along the way they thought they would, and that was killing her.

Ben had his eyes closed wanting to enjoy the touch before it was over. He knew it was just a way to thank him for the attention he was giving her, but then Ben felt this sudden heat and Bev was pressing her lips against his.

"Bev!" He said pulling away. Ben never imagined he would deny her kisses, but Bill was still his friend, so he couldn't do that, even though he wanted so much. And the only reason Beverly did that, was because she was hurt. She would regret it later.

Ben stared at her waiting for an explanation, but she just didn't know what to say. She had the urge to feel loved. She needed that, and she knew Ben could give her that.

"Please, Ben. Please." She caressed his chest one more time and kissed him again.

"Bev—" Ben was trying to focus and stop her, but Beverly had one of her legs on top of his and was almost straddling him. "Bill!" He tried to remind her of their friend. "We can't—"

"We're so done, Ben. So done." She said between kisses and moved on top of him wanting to have more access to his lips and body.

Whatever had happened could have ended their relationship, and Ben was surprised to know that Bill was the problem, but what if it wasn't official? That'd be cheating, and he couldn't handle it.

"Beverly." Ben finally managed to say it seriously and held her hands so she'd stop.

Beverly was straddling him and looked down waiting for whatever he wanted to say. She knew he wanted that. She just had to convince him it was okay to do it. Ben was so responsible and caring wanting to make sure it was okay to everybody, and she really appreciated that since most guys treated her like crap, but at the moment she just wanted him to let it go and show her how much he loved her.

"I can't do this to Bill."

"I need you, Ben. Bill doesn't mean anything to me anymore. If he ever truly cared about me, he'll understand."

With that being said, Beverly took her t-shirt off, passing it over her head, and throwing it somewhere, exposing herself to Ben. He was shocked with the sight. He dreamed about that for years, so it was really hard to believe.

She went for his shirt next and he stopped her.

"What-" She started to say realizing he wasn't going to do it when he interrupted her.

"I'm… fat."

Beverly was shocked to hear that. Did he think that was a problem? Absolutely not.

"I don't care." She took it off rapidly wanting him to stop worrying about that.

"I love you so much, Bevvie, but I... I wanna make sure you won't regret it later!"

"I could never regret you, Ben. I love you!" He wasn't sure about that, but okay. Anyway, should he tell her?

"It's just that... I-I haven't been with anyone before."

"What? You're a virgin?"

"Well..."

"Oh god! You don't have to do this if you don't want!" Bev worried. Now it was clear why he was so hesitant. She didn't want to push him. She just wanted to finally let him know how she felt for him.

"I—"

In his eyes she could see he wanted to. The desire for her clearly there as he stroke her sides and let his gaze go down to her breasts hidden by her bra, but the shape of her perky nipples was visible. He licked his lips and she smirked. Of course, Ben wanted to. It was always there his love for her, since they met, and she just decided to ignore, because Bill seemed more interesting. He didn't seem interesting at now. But Ben, even with his overweight he seemed hot. Not that being fat was a problem, but he clearly thought it was. Bev wanted to show him he was perfect for who his was inside and not his body.

"Touch me." She whispered simply wanting to encourage him. She needed this so bad and Ben wanted to touch it too.

He obeyed and took his hands to each one of her boobs and massaged them. She leaned her head back and open her mouth trying to feel everything.

That wasn't enough. That was too gentle, and she wanted to be loved, but not to be treated like a delicate butterfly. She needed him.

Beverly ground her core against Ben's crotch and they both moaned. She rapidly took her bra off exposing her breasts to him and laughed of his expression of completely wander.

Her breasts were small and full of freckles. Her nipples were rosy and small too. But to Ben, they seemed perfect, heaven. Beverly couldn't believe she could cause that reaction in a guy. He was obviously hard and through his jeans! How could she feel him like that?

As fast as she could, Beverly unbuckled his belt and opened his jeans. The head of his cock could be clearly seen, and he blushed as she stared so deeply. He was so big. She just wanted to put it in her mouth and suck until he had come hard.

"Bev—" He tried to say. Ben couldn't handle anymore his embarrassment, but Beverly had plans.

"Have you ever gotten a blowjob?"

His eyes widened with the question, but she stared at him waiting for an answer so confidently he couldn't not say the truth.

"N-no."

"Good." Was that really a good thing? What it if he couldn't control himself and come in her mouth without a warning? But Bev didn't seem to mind at all. She stared dragging his clothes down and fully exposed him. His face hit up like never before and she had her mouth on him.

"Ooh, Bev!"

Ben put his hand in her hair as she took his entire length in her mouth. He couldn't believe it was happening. It felt so good and he loved her so much.

Ben panted, and he reach her throat and then her lips again. She sucked the tip and licked everything she could while massaging his balls.

"Shit!" Ben grabbed her shoulders and shoved her off him. "I almost—"

"You don't want to?"

"Yeah! But not now!" He couldn't believe he had said that to her so easily. He didn't want to make it so clear he wanted her that bad. He didn't want to pressure her. "I-I mean, lf you w-want it, I do t-too, but i-it's okay if you d—"

Bev leaned in and kissed his lips sweetly.

"I do. A lot." She stood up in the bed and took off her pants before sitting on him again. Normally, Beverly would also take her panties off, but she wanted Ben to do that this time. She wanted to see his face the moment he met her core for the first time.

She leaned down again kissing him hungrily, making their tongues dance around each other.

Ben grabbed her ass and squeezed wanting to feel her more. If it weren't for the cotton panties he'd be inside her already. He was never so eager but would always respect her wishes.

He switched the positions settling on top of her, doing his best not to smash her, but she grabbed his ass and pulled him closer, not minding his weight. When would he forget about it and just enjoy it?

Then, she put her arms around his neck and kissed him. She could feel his erection lined up to enter her, but separated by the fabric, and he could feel her breasts rubbing against his chest. That felt so good and they ground against each other.

Ben looked down at her, at her small boobs, and she offered them to him, too eager to wait for him to create the courage to do it.

"Put your mouth on me, Ben."

He was happy to oblige and did as he was told. He licked her left nipple sweetly watching her bristle and arch her back for more friction. He sucked this time and she moaned. That was the best sound he had ever heard, so he kept doing to both as he listened to her moans and whines, while they rubbed their intimacies.

"Oh my god! Ben, I need you inside me!" He didn't move a muscle, lying there on top of her chest instead of doing what she wanted. "Ben?" She asked not understanding. He was so happy before about doing everything she wanted, but this time he just wasn't doing anything. Had he changed his mind?

"Beg for it."

"What?" She couldn't believe she had heard that.

Ben looked her in the eyes and repeated.

"Beg me to make love to you." She would never expect him to be so bold, but he wasn't asking to fuck her. He was asking to love her, for real. "I need to hear you say you want this as bad as I do."

"Oh, Ben." She could not put in words how much she wanted that. "I want you so bad. You're amazing and gentle and just awesome and I want you so bad. I need to feel you inside me. I need you to make love to me like you do!"

He wasn't expecting that confession, but definitely couldn't deny what she wanted after that.

Ben sat up, between her thighs and dragged her panties down, revealing her heated core. It was different than he had expected. So wet, rosy and... definitely beautiful. He couldn't decide what he like most, her breasts, ass, or boobs. She was just so perfect. He had never needed her so bad. He was so glad he had her.

In seconds, Ben had buried his entire face in her pussy, as he licked, and fingered her, expecting to make her feel better than ever before, but she couldn't take for too long. Her body shrunk, and she arched her hips as she rode out her orgasm.

"Ben!" She cried out. "Come here. Please, now!"

She pulled his hair and he had no option other then go up and kiss her in the lips.

The kiss was determined, urgent, like it was the last. They separated for mere seconds to breathe and then they were kissing again fiercely.

Ben couldn't wait anymore as Bev ground against his dick. He reached down, lined himself up and then buried completely inside her.

"Holy shit!"

"Ben!"

With his instincts he started to move in a medium pace, trying to get used to the position and the movements. Bev started making soft sounds and Ben took that as a good sign and sped up. He was just worried he would crush her and since he wasn't used to that, he wasn't very good either. It was just hard to do and think and feel at the same time.

"Ben, harder!"

But he couldn't do harder. He would crush her!

"D-don't wanna crush you Bev."

"Don't worry about that!"

She switched positions and sat on him. It's not like she wasn't liking and didn't trust him. Bev knew Ben could and would figure it out, but she couldn't handle him being afraid of crushing because he thought he was too fat. She wanted him to forget that at that moment. She wanted him to enjoy and feel everything.

Well, Ben definitely enjoyed the view. As Bev rode him, he could her body perfectly and he loved that. Her breasts bounced as she moved, and he licked his lips. Ben suddenly sat up. It was hard to get close because of his belly, but he was so mesmerized by her boobs that he didn't notice and did the best he could to reach them.

Ben supported his weight with one hand and the other moved to her left boob and squeezed it making Bev moan even louder. He licked her nipple wanting to hear more of that and Bev supported herself by circling his neck with her arms, so she could move faster. Ben groaned but kept working on her breasts and Bev felt herself approaching her climax again.

"Oh, Ben! Ben!" She went as fast as she could, and he held her by her back to make sure she could keep the movements till the end.

Beverly buried her face in his neck trying to recover and he held her not believing he had made her cum again.

She looked at him breathless and realized something.

"Did you?"

Ben felt himself blush.

"Uhm... I wanted to make sure you liked it—"

She smiled sweetly and kissed him softly not believing how much he cared about her. It was his first time and she completely understood if he couldn't control himself, but he only cared about her.

She made him lie down and started moving again, he was still inside her and very hard. She wanted it to be _his_ time. She had had sex a lot before.

Ben grabbed her ass and squeezed it making her let a muffled moan.

"Ben, I want you to cum for me." She whispered in his ear and he shivered, grabbing her hips to make her ride him faster.

"Bev..."

It was too much, too good for both.

Her breasts were moving right in front of his face now and he reached up sucking and alternating between them.

Ben was moving her so fast she couldn't take it again. She was more sensitive now due to her other two orgasms and she came hard.

"Ben! Ben! Ben! Ohh! I love you!"

Ben was surprised by that and he wanted to say it back, but it could be only a thing of that the moment due to her orgasm, so he decided to remain quiet.

He watched her convulse on top of him again, one more time marveled and she feel on him panting and kissing his neck.

They remained like that for a few minutes until she the gathered the strength to sit up again.

"Ben!" She couldn't believe he still hadn't finished. It was so good for her, it wasn't possible! "Do you normally take long to cum?"

Ben hated talking about it. He never had to have that conversation before.

"I-I hadn't d-done that before, Bevvie!"

"I know, but when you were doing it to yourself—"

"Oh my God, Beverly!" He lay his head in her chest too embarrassed and she laughed finding it cute.

"It's okay, Ben. We're intimate now."

Beverly removed herself from him and started crawling down until she was facing his dick. Ben would normally be embarrassed, but he was too curious to know what she wanted to do.

"Ben, I want you to come for me. We aren't leaving 'till you do."

She licked the side of his dick and even the fact he had been inside her a few seconds before was totally forgotten as again he couldn't believe what was happening.

"Holy shit."

Beverly looked in his eyes as she put all of him inside her mouth and when he touched her throat he saw stars.

"Oh fuck!"

Ben grabbed her hair and she started moving her head up down. He could feel himself brushing against her tongue. It was all just too erotic.

"Oh Bev, I'm coming!"

She removed him from her mouth and stroked his dick until he came on her boobs. Ben watched everything feeling like anytime he would wake up from his dream.

When he was done, Beverly took a bit of his cum and tasted it. Ben almost got hard again but he needed a few minutes for that to happen again.

Bev lied by his side and he used his t-shirt to clean her up. Then she lied on his chest feeling really comfortable. How couldn't she not have known that before? That it was him all the time?

"Thanks for that, Bevvie. It was really nice." He said as he struck her hair. It was so soft and beautiful. Ben always wanted to do that.

She laughed.

"Well, thank _you._ " She chuckled a little bit more and he kissed her nose and cheeks, right where her freckles were. He was happy even if it was just that. At least he spent some time with her. Better than nothing. "I meant it though." She continued, and he frowned.

"About what?"

"About loving you. I've always loved you and I'm sorry I put you through all that. I was blind, and I know you love me."

Ben still wasn't sure if it would be over when she left, but still he had to say.

"I do love you, Bevvie. It was the best moment of my whole life!"

She smiled. Why was he always like this? Why had she denied him for so long?

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 **AN: Well, that's it. I didn't want to mention what Bill did, because even though I ship Benverly, I like Bill and couldn't really see him hurting Beverly.**


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